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We have to rebook the meeting in another office, J_________. Sorry, but this was all last minute and no one could get in touch with you. Are you home? Call me back, soon.
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Hi, umm…you didn’t say anything to me last night. I mean, you said something, but you didn’t say everything. You wanted to tell me something but didn’t say what it was. Just talk to me. Bye.
*
Mr. J___________, we have not seen you for quite some time now, and we are wondering about whether you are still interested in volunteering with us. Every child needs a big brother, or big sister, and we felt that you were an excellent candidate for spending time with one of the young kids who would like to meet you. It would be a shame if you couldn’t spend a little bit of time with a lucky child. Please call back. You…
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Sorry about that. We got cut off. Please reach us when you can. Bye-bye.
*
Hey, dick! Check your messages! Been trying to reach you for a week now and nothing. It’s R__________. Your friend. The one you’ve forgotten and left to rot. Remembering any of this? Call!
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Yeah, me again. You said that you wanted to see me but then you made me do all the work. Ha, ha. I’m always the one talking. Nothing from you. Want to hear from me again, you talk, then…
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Mr. J___________, this is Dr.________________’s office call to confirm your next appointment. We do have the results of the last series of tests and feel that we should discuss them with you in person. Please contact us as soon as possible.
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Okay, okay. That didn’t go so well, did it? What’s up with you? They just wanted you to explain the method to them after they went through the file. Is there something I should know? You didn’t sign off on the testing, either. Need your name on the form. Bye.
*
Well… Well, well, well. Just… What do I say now? I am torn between hating you and feeling very sorry for you. Imagine it from my side of the table. Just… You were smart. Public place; a lot of families eating together. God, you asshole. You real asshole… Just don’t call me anymore. Oh right, you never do call. You just drop this shit whenever you can. Don’t try reaching me. Asshole.
*
So, you told me. Well, I told you to be careful, didn’t I? You don’t do all the thinking, do you? Let the little head take over… Shit, man, this all fucking stinks. How’d it happen, anyway? Not that it really matters. Does it matter? Anyway, hit me back.
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Mr. J______________, we do need to discuss certain precautions and medicine now available. You do know that insurance will only cover so much. Please reach us at your convenience.
*
Me again. Don’t know why I do this to myself. Just wanted to hear your voice. You can call me. You can, y’know. Just do it soon. Bye.
- End of messages
Writer/Reader/Poet/Dreamer... Kendall is a college instructor, experimenter with the written word, and someone who thinks that books are worth saving. (Also: librarians and snail mail—damn you, Canada Post and certain school boards!) I just hope that someone gets a laugh and enjoys my work...
